Why can't boys like cats, too?

When it comes to the gender line, having extreme masculine on one end and extreme feminine on the other, both Jeremy and I lie towards the center of that scale. I’m proud to say there’s no ‘machismo’ running through his veins, and no ‘girly girl’ running through mine. I believe this is why we’ve always felt a kindred spirit between the two of us. I know they say opposites attract, but a lot of times, that opposition can have its pitfalls down the line. Often there isn’t a connection or understanding when sitting on either extreme.

I picture one of those fancy long tables where the man and woman sit on opposite ends with countless chairs between them. They need an intercom, or at the least, two tin cans on a wire to communicate. There’s almost a sense of archetypal duty engrained in these end seats. This is one thing I hope our son does not fall into. I think this is the fear I had with the idea of having a boy. I just have little tolerance for an extremely masculine and macho man; vice versa an extremely girlish woman. A man can still be strong, without being macho. A woman can still be feminine, without being girly. If that makes any sense.

One of the places I saw evidence of this stereotype was shopping for baby boy clothes. Everything was blue and had either a truck, a car or some sport related icon on the front. Why is this instilled in boys at such a young age? The girl’s attire had cats, while the boy’s had dogs. Why can’t a boy like a cat? Even the toys were very extreme. Boys had toy trucks and lawnmowers, while the girls had Barbie’s and play kitchens.

Personally, I would have no problem letting my son play with a Barbie or playing with pots and pans. Who knows, maybe he’ll become a great fashion designer or grand cook.

The annoyance and frustrations are not just limited for the boys. If we had a girl, I definitely wouldn’t want to instill pink and glitter in everything. My mom was a hippie at heart, and in so, she was never ultra girly, which is most likely where I got it from. I’ve always appreciated both my parent's stable gender role-modeling on me. They encouraged me in anything I wanted to do, whether it was music or sports. And, they never pushed me in one direction or another. Although, my mom never really liked me having Barbie’s, but that was due to the unrealistic idea of beauty for woman. I tend to agree, even though I still had my fair share of the dolls. On the other hand, I also had my fair share of Legos and Erector Sets.

A Renaissance Man; this is what Jeremy hopes our son to become.

I think that’s a fantastic description on how we’d like to raise him. Hopefully, he’ll have a little of both of our personalities and temperaments, likes and dislikes. Hopefully he’ll enjoy the academics as well the sports; art and music as well as video games and Star Wars action figures (this one more for Jeremy, obviously).

I know there are those out there who will say, “But, you can’t always mold who your child will become, you can’t change his personality.”

True.

But, who knows? Perhaps he will become some big WWF Wrestler or (God forbid) football player and like little to nothing else that both Jeremy and I enjoy of life.

But, we can at least instill not only morals and a sense of right and wrong, but a vast understanding and outlook on all aspects of life in general, making him a more well rounded person.

Hopefully.

It wouldn’t hurt, right?